Tuesday, I was grounded in grace and felt connected and at ease. I was committed to self care. I was swimming in faith and trusted in the mysterious unfolding of life. I felt held and supported, a small piece of the oneness puzzle.
Wednesday, I packed too much into the morning routine. I made a few “wrong turns” that led me into traffic. I hit every red light and I still held to the notion that “all is well”.
I was late to my first appointment and everything worked out fine. I took a yoga class from a dear friend and then taught a class. I felt alive and vibrant.
Then I got a message that triggered me into a downward spiral. After the phone conversation I was fearful, angry, and full of shame. I felt terrible about myself and I then let that affect the rest of my day. I chose to feel depressed and fearful.
I continue to be amazed how willingly and quickly I give my peace away. I remember I am connected and at peace when things are going my way and then a little bump in the road sends me spiraling downward into a pit of shame and despair.
The difference is I don’t have to stay there for days or weeks. I woke up Thursday morning again remembering that I am connected. I now remember that my worth is not tied to my actions and that I am loved, loving, and lovable.
I do not know what the end results of this phone conversation will be but today my wellbeing is not tied to a certain outcome. Whether I get to keep things the way I love them or I am asked to change and let go, all is well! I repeat, all is well!